Running Free

I frequent Facebook more often than is probably healthy. In fact, I think involvement in that site is probably not healthy, but that's beside the point. I posted this today:

"Running is, by far, the best therapy."

My first run after the half-marathon was a lap around Green Lake. A single 5k run. I finished feeling unsatisfied - I had just warmed up! But, my legs were still tired, and I didn't want to push myself to injury. Furthermore, I don't know if it's due to overtraining around that particular track or if I was annoyed that it was only 5pm and already really, really dark outside or perhaps I was agitated by all the traffic or maybe it's because i was feeling a little under the weather, but it wasn't a particularly enjoyable run.

I have not gotten into any sort of personal specifics on this blog, and that has been entirely by design. I learned early that, when you write about your misadventures (especially those that involve other people), you are bound to offend or upset someone. especially when you cannot monitor your audience. i've always been surprised when i find out that someone reads what I have to write.

So, hi. My name is Kristen. I am currently 27 years old, i am a scientist in real life, i have recently fallen back in love with running after a long injury-induced hiatus, i am a music geek, i have a soft spot for 1980s pop (probably due to my full enjoyment of karaoke), and i recently completed a dance class that revolved around the dances in lady gaga's music videos. i live in seattle, as i have for the last four years and i love it here. no, the rain really isn't that bad. i'm very close to my parents - they are my heroes and i aspire to positively affect as many lives as they have, and my sister is probably my favorite person in this whole universe. Oh -- and have i mentioned that my love life is a mess and generally has been for the majority of my adult life?

For as long as I've been dating (we'll say it started when I was 18), running has been the only reliable outlet for all frustrations, insecurities, excitement...everything. Bad break-up? Go running. Elated over being asked to the dance by the jock? Go running. Fall in love? Go running. Heartbroken? ...you get the picture. Even when it's not romance-related, I've come to find that I can work out all the world's problems when I'm kicking along to the beat of a song by The Cure. That half-hour or two hours seems to be the only time of my day when I can get into a good mindset and analytically approach any of my personal goings-on and determine, with resolve, a solution, or at least the first step on the path toward a solution.

I left work on Wednesday with a lot weighing on my brain. Without going into detail, I will let you in on the fact that it is, in fact, related to the current state of my dating life. And following the trend of the last 9 years, running provided some reprieve from the pain of insecurity, rejection, and frankly, loneliness. This was the first "free run" that I've done in a long time - one of those runs when you don't have to adhere to any schedule, you don't have a schedule telling you how far you should go or how quickly you should do it. I decided to tour some of my favorite running spots on this one. It brought me from Eastlake to the Seattle Center which was lovingly illuminated by Christmas lights, under the monorail on 5th avenue, up Pike through the cloud of hipster-produced smoke (*cough cough*), through Cal Anderson, and along twinkle-light-lit Broadway. It was around this time that my phone (which was acting as music substitute for my iPod due to low battery) stopped playing music and started ringing. It was my dad, calling to inform me that my sister was in the hospital after four days of illness led to a fever spike over 104F. He said that she will be fine, but thought that it wouldn't be fair to keep the information from me.

I had an entirely new fear to run from. And I ran like I was being chased. It turns out that worry and anxiety makes the pain in my hips and burning lungs disappear. I ran with an aggressive gait down 10th, crossed I-5 at Roanoake, down to Eastlake and back to the start. Crying and harried, I realized how silly it is to worry about the little things. SO what if I'm single? So what if he rejected me? So what if that asshole insinuated that I was fat? There are far more important things that deserve my time and energy.

My sister is slowly on the mend. She's feeling better, although unsure if she'll be able to leave the hospital tonight. And...my situation is still where it was before, but my endorphin fix has helped me to feel better about it. And though menial, it still serves as a great motivator to get out and run.

A Series of Fortunate Emails

30 November 2010
kristenrunning to Dad:

Hey Dad,

I sometimes eat at my desk, and decided to look at available upcoming half-marathons. Are you scheduled through February already? I ask because there's a half-marathon in New Orleans on Sunday, Feb. 13th. I've never been to The Big Easy, and this run sounds like it would give me a chance to see a lot of good sights. Furthermore, the elevation map for the race looks like it's mostly flat, which could mean a big PR for me. Here's a write-up about the race: http://www.halfmarathons.net/usa_half_marathons_louisiana_mardi_gras_marathon.html

I have plenty of time to start training, and it's not like I'm starting from scratch - I just did a half marathon two days ago :) I'd only do this one if it meant that I'd get a chance to hang out with you, so what do you think? Is it too late to try and schedule a 4-day weekend in February? I think New Orleans would be a run father-daughter trip...

If this is too soon, I am considering a few races later in the spring (May or June), including the Tacoma City half-marathon, the Capital City half marathon in Olympia, Vancouver BC half marathon, San Diego Rock 'n Roll half marathon, and the Seattle Rock 'n Roll half marathon. I'm still doing some research, too. These could be great excuses to travel a bit (there are races EVERYWHERE), and I'd love to have a fun weekend with you.

Love you lots, Dad. Hope you're enjoying your day!

Kristen


05 December 2010

Dad to kristenrunning:

Sweetie,,, Forgive me for being so late in returning this. It is breaking my heart to tell you we cant make the New Orleans deal. Mom and I are going on vaca the first week of Feb,,, probable at St Barts in the Caribbean. Then my band plays feb 10th for a benefit for shrine hospital. Please look further down the line.. dad
ps... the san diego deal speaks to me.. hows about a weekend at the hotel del????

kristenrunning to dad:

San Diego and the Hotel Del sound fantastic. Can you make June 5th work with your schedule?
PS -- Glad to hear that you and Mom are taking a well-deserved tropical vacation! That sounds absolutely lovely :) Love you mucho!

Dad to kristenrunning:

sounds great,,,, have to check the schedule. dad

kristenrunning to Dad:

Great! Do you think we can plan for a 3- or 4-day weekend? Maybe take the Monday and Tuesday following the race to enjoy the city? I'd say we should do so before the race, but I'll probably be a little bit jittery. I think we'd have more fun if we took that next two days. Just a thought :)

Dad to kristenrunning:

FABULOUS

Excellent on your syntax, specifically your capitalization in the digital age. Did I send you the one of the importance of capitalization, visa vis "your mom is out side helping your Uncle Jack off the horse" as opposed to "your mom is outside helping your uncle jack off the horse".....

kristenrunning to Dad:

Hahahahaha! Were you just looking for an excuse to drop that joke on me? :)

I'm afraid that you did not send me the one about the importance of capitalization...but have you seen this? http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe

let me know about the schedule as soon as you find out. The fees don't go up until February, but these sometimes sell out, too. I'd like to secure a spot before that happens :)

Here's the race website: http://san-diego.competitor.com. I'm glad you'll see me run this one (assuming scheduling goes well, of course) because the rock 'n roll series is fun for everyone involved. There's a band at every mile marker, and lots of excited people.

I'm excited!!! :) :) :)

Dad to kristenrunning:

I 99% certain I am free. Book it, Danno....

good stuff. still like the uncle jack stuff. sorry so late,,,, doin the dishes. I am excited about June 5!!!!!! so is mom,,,, should I invite her?

kristenrunning to Dad:

OF COURSE :) The more the merrier!!!!


Rock 'n' Roll San Diego to kristenrunning, kristenrunning forwarded to Dad:

Dear Kristen,
Congratulations! You are now registered for the 2011 Dodge Rock 'n' Roll San Diego - Half Marathon. Please check the event's website for updates.
Please note: Each participant must pick up their own race number at the Health & Fitness Expo. Go to the Expo page of the race website, www.san-diego.competitor.com, for times and location of the Expo.


Dodge Rock 'n' Roll San Diego

Dad to kristenrunning:

woohoo




So....yeah. I'm returning to the town of my birth to run the San Diego Rock 'n' Roll Half Marathon in June. I'm still hoping to run one in February or March, but I'm so excited to run a race where my family will be waiting for me at the finish line!!!!!!

'Tis the season for festive running socks

It's the most wonderful time of the year!

Seattle half-marathon: Race report

Above is my bib number. It was special for a few reasons:
1) The number is a palindrome, a sure sign of luck.
2) The last two digits of the number are my age.
3) This number contains my favorite number. Twice! (The number 7 is special for me. Coincidentally, my first, middle, and last names all contain 7 letters. On a more fun and unique level, my siblings and I have always worn jerseys with numbers that are multiples of 7).

These were all good signs.

I arrived at the starting line about 45 minutes before the race after tossing and turning all night. This gave me plenty of time to drop off my clothes bag, warm up, stretch, acclimatize to the chilly Seattle winter morning (37F!), and shake out the nerves. It was dark outside, and there was a picturesque layer of fog blanketing the city. The Christmas lights atop the Space Needle and those affixed to one of the Queen Anne radio towers shone lazily through the light cloud cover. Basically, what I'm trying to tell you is that it was magical.

After the half-marathon walkers started their race, we runners all crowded into the starting gates. I have to admit, being surrounded by thousands and thousands of people threw me a bit out of my comfort zone - I get nervous in crowds, and we were crammed onto 5th avenue like sardines. People were bustling, trying to find their pacers if they were shooting for a time, and the collective excitement threw an electricity into the air. And finally, at 7:30, the announcer sounded the buzzer and we were off. Welll...we were off after some delay :) There were so many runners that I didn't cross the starting line until almost 4 minutes had passed! I didn't mind - I knew I wouldn't be one of the first finishers, and I didn't want those super fast people to have to dodge me as they raced down 5th. And I have to say, it was kind of fun being in the back a little bit because as we ran through downtown, it was an absolute trip looking up 5th and seeing it completely covered in runners as far as the eye could see.



For those of you who don't know, Seattle's half marathon course is not an easy one. I'm sure you could have figured that out yourself, as Seattle is known for its hills and trust me on this one: they're pretty rough. I knew what was ahead, and figured that hanging out by the 2h pacers would keep me from burning through all of my energy before hitting the hillier second half of this race. In theory, I think this was a good idea, but I just couldn't find my stride with them. They were just a bit slower than the pace that I naturally adopt. So, around mile 4, I picked it up and settled into my smooth (hi Slomo!). At this point, I couldn't stop smiling. Apart from the hilliness and the distance you spend in the I-90 Express Lanes tunnel, this is a beautiful course. You get to run through downtown, then along Lake Washington (which had this lovely, eerie appearance in the gray morning), which leads you to Galer to dump you onto Madison, but then you get to run through a lovely tree-filled arboretum, and then along Interlaken (my favorite running street in Seattle!). That puts you onto Roanoake, then Harvard, which puts you on Lakeview where you get amazing downtown and Lake Union and Space Needle views. The last mile or so brings you through the ugly part of SLU, but that's ok because you're so darned tired that you don't even notice. So, yeah. I had found my smooth, I was admiring Lake Washington, and could burst with happiness. But, as I traveled north, nerves started to set in a little bit. Galer was coming up and that mother is steep. And right after that, is a good 1/2 mile climb up Madison. Trust me, it hurts. I remember doing this in 2008, and I stopped to walk a good portion of it.

I didn't want to walk any of my race.

So, I finally got to the point where I saw runners turning left up a steep incline, many of them stopping to walk, and I knew that it was time. I said out loud, "Well, Kristen, let's do this!" I turned uphill, slowed my pace a little and powered through it. Galer is steep, but it is short and usually surrounded by awesome fans braving the cold to cheer their runners on. I made it up just fine, but the next left dumped me onto Madison, a long hill that is just plain scary. i didn't look at the top, and instead focused on the people around me. Sure, there were folks walking it, but there were also a lot who were still running. If they can do it, I can too, right? So, head down, iPod bumpin, I pushed through. Sure, I was tired, but reaching the top of the hill was almost as good as crossing the finish line. I did it without walking! And I was still running! I threw my arms up in the air and jumped for joy. The man running next to me screamed "YES! YOU ROCKED THAT HILL!" I smiled and screamed "YOU DID TOO! YOU'RE AWESOME!" We high-fived, and then continued on our run. This is a memory that I will probably carry with me for the rest of my life.


The run continued, as previously described, onto my favorite running street in all of Seattle. As soon as we crossed 23rd, I kind of hit autopilot and loved every second I spent on that street. Every view was gorgeous, and I knew I was getting close. And everythign was just fine until that last mile. Boy, oh boy did I hit a wall. It's like all my energy drained, and I still had a mile! Every fiber in my body wanted me to stop, but luckily, sheer will is not a fiber. It's something that we tap into and somehow, miraculously, it carries us through. And somehow, it carried me up that last little hill on Mercer (granted, I *may* have cried a little bit), and into the stadium at the Seattle Center. And really, that's all I needed because when I entered, I saw the clock, which told me that, despite crossing the starting line 3.5 minutes after the official start, I'd still get an official time under 2 hours.

The amount of accomplishment and happiness I felt overwhelmed me. I could have cried. Instead, my legs picked up pace, I dodged through the many other sub-2-hour half-marathoners, and gleefully threw my arms in the air ahd smiled as big as I could as I crossed the finish line.

13 weeks of training. 13.1 miles. Official time of 1:58:fortysomething. Chip time of 1:55:29. I couldn't be happier. And now I'm trying to figure out where I want to travel for a February half marathon. Addicted much?

Hey there, running. It's good to be back :)

Seattle half-marathon: pre-race report

I am posting from my cell phone. Please forgive any typos, etc. Why not from my computer? Well, I am lucky enough to have the support of wonderful friends, one of which is allowing me to spend the night in her apartment, which is significantly closer to the starting line than the greenwood abode. This means more sleep, less stress, and no endless search for parking.

So, yeah. It's here! Tomorrow is the big day, my first race since back/pelvis complications led to hamstring injuries that kept me out for what seemed to be an eternity. When I signed up for this half marathon, my main purpose was to get myself back into running, to rediscover my love for it, and, perhaps to get back into shape. So, regardless of what happens tomorrow, I have already accomplished what I set out to do 13 weeks ago. My cardiovascular capacity is so much greater - I have felt it in cycling and in ultimate. My legs are stronger and, if I fo say so myself, more shapely and muscular than they have been in years. But more importantly, I have rediscovered the addiction. I love this sport, I cannot imagine going more than 2 or 3 days without a good run, even in the craziest weather (snOMG!). I want to run more races, more half marathons, and maybe even a full marathon someday!

So, yes, tomorrow is the culmination of 13 weeks of training, but it does not in any way mean the end of running. Rather, I think it's just a beginning. Thank you all for your support during these training runs. I can't wait to share the results with all of you :)

Dear Running,

I've been meaning to write an open letter to you recently so that we could have a discussion about where I am, where you are, and how things are working out so far. I think that this is an important exercise, and I tend to employ it in all relationships - friendships, or on the rare occasion that I find I've been seeing a boy for a few months. I mean, it usually takes a few months for the honeymoon phase to wear off, for real issues to be brought up, for intimacy to develop. We start showing our real selves, and things do get more difficult. We have to evaluate, ensure that both sides are committed and willing to make any necessary changes or compromises.

You and I have very much engaged in an on-again/off-again sort of courtship for a decade or so, due largely to injuries butting in and taking me away from you, or taking you away from me. After losing you so many times, I have to admit, I was reluctant to accept the our involvement with each other again. I even avoided it for almost a year! I did not want to face the pain of losing you again, and in turn, losing a happier part of myself.

I'm glad I decided to give us a chance again.

You have taught me that I'm capable of so much more than I expect, that hard work pays off. You have taught me that I am beautiful, strong, and capable if determined. You have given me hours for self-reflection, for music-listening, for daydreaming. You have helped me to decompress, work out the worst of my work-related stress, and return with calm resolve and a plan. You complete me.

Thank you so much for being such a great part of my life.

Love,
Kristen

Oh, holy mother of quad!

A time it was, and what a time it was...

Between a hyperactive social schedule, an ultimate frisbee tournament, and a difficult work week, my blogging suffered, as did my running schedule. I skipped 1 training run. In the words of a good friend, "This is how I express my displeasure: BOOOOOOOOOO!" That aside, it has been an amazing couple of weeks, and I feel entirely too charmed in the current state of my existence.

First, a recap from my ultimate frisbee tournament, Hanford Howl. It's a less competitive (but still fun) costume tournament that takes place over Halloween weekend every year in Richland, WA. Teams pick a theme and all the members of the team dress to that theme. Last year, my tournament team chose a German theme, went 7-0 in games, and won the tournament. Here we are in full costume!

(Photo courtesy of my teammate, Mama Flew)

This year, we were looking for a repeat championship. However, we chose not to recycle our German dirndls and leiderhosen, instead favoring a Hawaii theme. I didn't feel like donning a grass skirt for ulti, and i wanted to do something creative. From this thought process emerged the following:



As expected, our first day brought with it fun games, relaxed competition, and great costumes. We played a team that dressed as drinks, one dressed as Greek gods, a young team from Whitworth dressed as Scrabble, and (my personal favorite) Star Wars. Seriously! There was a player dressed as Jabba the Hut, and watching him run in that costume was quite possibly one of the most entertaining parts of that weekend. They were fun teams, but it was pretty nice to win all of our games that day because it gave us a first-round bye the next morning. Yes, friends, we got to sleep in and start immediately in quarterfinals. Sunday was a windy, windy day. While this destroys *my* ability to accurately throw a disc, it's not something that phases the much better players on my team, and allowed us to blow through quarterfinals against Olympia with only three points scored on us. Then came semifinals against another Seattle team. I knew a lot of the players on this team, and I *may* have been talking a little bit of friendly smack at the tournament party the night before. I was invested, and I was determined to live up to my promise of destroying the other team. During that game, I ran harder, faster, and more focused than in any other game that weekend. And I scored the first two points of the game! THis is huge in windy games, because upwind breaks really sets the team in an advantageous position, since it's so hard to throw into the wind. I had a few good D's, and scored another two points, and in doing so, contributed to the team's victory! We won! We were going to finals against Idaho/Big Sky Ultimate! Because it was late, and because we all had a long way to drive at the end of the game, both teams agreed to cut the game at 11 points. It was hard-fought, and it came with the price tag of a pulled quad (I don't think I'd ever pulled a quad before!), but we won. With no more than 2 female subs at a time, with low numbers all around, we emerged victorious. Ladies and gents, your 2010 Hanford Howl Champions:



...and as always happens when I play a tournament with the Rainmakers, I'm in love with ultimate again.

So...yeah. I walked away with a pulled quad. There was no bruising, so I wasn't concerned about a tear, but was shaken enough to postpone my 11 mile run (originally planned for Monday) until Tuesday. And boy, oh boy, did I ever feel it. It pulled just enough to remind me it was there all the way through my first five miles (which brought me from SLU along Mercer to the Seattle Center, by the fountains, by the Space Needle, through downtown, and up TO THE TOP of Capitol Hill and that hill...uff da!). These miles were additionally frustrating due to waaaaaay too many red lights. Start! Stop! Wait! Repeat! Blergh! Things improved significantly once I got to the top of the hill. Along with my quad FINALLY loosening up, I got a nice long descent which invigorated me and enabled me to continue running without much strain, fewer lights, and much less traffic. I ran down Madison, through the arboretum, along interlaken, then Lakeview to Denny and back to SLU to round out about 11 miles. Yahoo!

I skipped my midweek run (Kristen, you slacker!), but I had somehow managed to flood my social calendar and just lost time. Furthermore, I was (am) still nervous about my quad, and felt it necessary to baby it a little bit, which is extremely difficult now that my broken car has confined me to my bicycle for my around-town (read: escaping from Greenwood) transportation. AT this point, I feel it necessary to apologize for whining -- I just get a little bit scared with injury. My running buddies Zach and Zedd helped to motivate me into Friday's really rainy run on our normal Interlaken 5 mile route. We took a good, relaxed pace - I didn't feel too winded throughout it, which may have been a problem for Zach, as I was chattering through the entire run. It was a good confidence booster, and a lovely way to celebrate the official arrival of fall in Seattle. Yes, we ran through a deluge.

I could yammer on for way too long about all of this, and I still want to write about what occupies my mind during a run, or even publish the current iteration of my running playlist. Unfortunately, it is quite late, and tomorrow's 12 miles will most certainly require me to be well rested. 21 days left!

PS -- Thank you all for the encouragement, comments, advice, and support. Y'all have no idea how much it helps me, and I want you to know that you are, indeed, appreciated.